Bulldog

Here's Kellen with what I call his bulldog face. I would like to post the picture Ian got of him smiling yesterday, but I'm too tired to get it off the camera. It hasn't been as easy to get stuff done since Mom has been gone. Kellen has also gotten out of his perfect schedule. He doesn't always sleep for 3 hours straight after I feed him and he often takes an hour to settle and go to sleep now. I guess this is a little more realistic. I'm feeling more overwhelmed thinking that it will be impossible to get anything done around here. This morning it was 11 before I was able to have breakfast. He just wouldn't go back to sleep. When Ian got back from church today, I ran out to do a few errands while Kellen was sleeping. It seemed so strange to be outside and to be without him. Tomorrow Kellen will be a week old, well actually, just a couple of hours from now he will be exactly a week old. Every bit of me has been completely focused on him this last week. I was thinking today how my identity has totally changed. I have always identified myself by what I do. Whether it was being a volleyball player, an athlete, a student, or by my job. I've never thought about how I would see myself as a mother. It is very sobering, to think of how much I will impact his life. I think I better go to bed now and pray that God will help me to be the mother that he needs.

First bath

Last night Mom and I gave Kellen his first fully undressed bath at home. Being undressed seems to be his least favorite thing, but I think he liked his bath more than he thought he would at first. After a little protesting he seemed to maybe even enjoy a little. I love watching his reaction to things. Well, I just like watching him. I watched him sleep on the bed for a while last night and just stared at him in amazement. I can't believe how perfect he is. Since we've been home he's fallen into a very easy routine. Eat, stay alert and quiet for 20 min, sleep for 3 hours...It was easy to predict his pattern. I think he sensed that Grandma was gone tonight because he threw me off and only slept for an hour after supper tonight and was a little bit fussier. Ian and I finally gave him a bath after his short sleeping periods this evening and he is now sleeping very soundly. I'd better hurry and get to bed myself before he is up again and ready to eat.

I just have to say though how much I miss my Mom tonight. I can't imagine these first few days at home without her. She was so reassuring and encouraging. Interesting how I needed my Mom more than ever when I became a mother myself. We are never too old to be taken care of by our mother. It was wonderful to have meals ready, house cleaned, meals frozen ready to go, and Ian really appreciated the apple pies! Thanks for all your support Mom.

Kellen got Daddy!

Ian got up to change Kellen at about 5:30 this morning after I had fed him. I told him to throw the washcloth on the table over him when he took off his diaper or Kellen would get him! Maybe he was too tired and didn't hear me. I had to get up and take a picture when I heard Ian yell.

We had a good night again. After the early morning feed we all got to sleep in. Mom and I gave him a bath about 9 last night, which made him really mad. I think all the crying helped him to sleep well. I'm slowly getting used to his cry, but at first it would make me cry. He's so little and it breaks my heart to see him cry. It was good for me to find this little reading...

With our first child, that first night home from the hospital was a living nightmare for me. If she snuffled, I flew to her side, certain that I had somehow smoothered her. Oh, that I had listened to a loving husband's advice and remembered that we had done our best, I needed to sleep, and God was awake, watching over us all!...And He never goes to sleep. When you are bending over this soft little bundle in the night to lift her, comfort her, diaper her, or feed her, remember that your heavenly Father is bending over you.

For all the things I can't control, I have to remember that God is taking care of us all or I couldn't handle the worries. The first night it was hard to sleep and I would keep checking to make sure he was breathing.

I am holding you by your right hand--I, the Lord you God--and I say to you, Don't be afraid; I am here to help you. Isaiah 41:13 

He's here!

Kellen Peter Muirhead arrived 12:07 am Monday, Feb 20. He was 8 lbs, 3 oz. What a long day Sunday was. I thought they were going to send us home again, but they said I was 3 cm finally and would admit me. The nurse said its usually 1 cm an hour. Since it was 2 days for 2 cm we thought it was going to be a long week! I guess Kellen was ready to come though as it wasn't long before I was trying to grasp the reality that I had a son! I don't even feel like I can write about the experience yet. It's all so unreal. Besides, Kellen is going to wake up at any moment to be fed yet again. Just wanted to put out a picture. Maybe later tonight I'll share some thoughts and more pictures. Oh, yeah, Ian did great. He stayed on his feet the whole time and surprisingly enjoyed the amazing experience.

Sooner...or later

Your baby's first cry is the one you hear in the delivery room, the triumphant, tension-shattering sound that says, "I'm here, I'm breathing, I'm alive!"

I found this quote in a baby book that Andrea gave me for my birthday. I love it, but that moment has felt so far away if not impossible. Last night I never slept. I had contractions and around 2 they settled into a pretty regular 3-5 minutes apart, 30-50 seconds, but they weren't too intense. Since we had learned that when they are 3-5 minutes apart you should go to the hospital, at 4:30 a.m. we headed for Regina. Since it was the coldest night of the year, we didn't want to run the risk of a side of the road delivery. Well, I guess we should have waited. By about 8:00 a.m. we were told to come back to the hospital when they were stronger and they said I was only 1 cm dilated. So, Jenn, Ian and I headed to Humpty's for breakfast. I thought they would continue to get stronger, but they got less infrequent throughout the day. So at 3 p.m, we made the decision to all go home. It's 7:30 p.m. now and I have had some good sleep. I don't know what's in store for us tonight. It's easy to be frustrated. I felt bad that Jenn had got up in the middle of the night, met us at the hospital, and then I had to say "sorry." Not that she cared, she was glad we had gone, and said she knew first babies could take awhile. I try to remember that this is better than where I was yesterday, with no hope that the baby would come this weekend. And, while we were at the hospital I heard that triumphant cry come from another room. How amazing to think that we will soon here our baby's first cry.

The blah blah blog of the day

(Ian here) well my wife says I have to do the blog today , so here goes
What is a blog really? This term blog , is so new, to me at least that as
of yet it doesen't have it's own identity. So I suppose that what I am doing now is
partially creating its identity. That is to much responsibility for me. I better just sign off
untill the blog is a rock solid institution with set paramaters and boundries. untill then I bid you
adeiu.
ps. just kidding( mostly), we are impatiantly awaiting the newest and only arrival thus far to our family. This is our whole world right now.

Valentines Day

Here I am, 3 days past my due date. Hope you enjoy this one Julia, its for you. I am soon heading to Regina this morning for yet another dr's appt. I was just realizing that this will probably be the last one. Today I think she will make a plan for an induction early next week if nothing happens this weekend.









Thought I'd better brag about my wonderful husband when I had the chance. I didn't expect anything this Valentine's day since he was coming home late from work. He had managed to stop during the day and pick up some flowers. I don't think he has ever bought roses, because they are too traditional and common. If he buys flowers, its usually alstro, which were our wedding flowers. He told me he thought these were the prettiest color of roses and the bouquet does have matching alstro in it!

Still Waiting

Ian has asked very nicely that I hurry up and have the baby today. It's suppose to be cold tomorrow and he would rather not have to work outside in the cold. I wish I could answer this request. I'm feeling bored at home today. Last week a friend had stopped by and shared some of her memories of waiting for her baby (she has a 7 month old). She said that she expected her baby early and when it didn't happen, it felt like the baby would never come. As her due date past, she truly believed it would never happen. We laughed about it then, but today its not so funny. I think I understand that feeling.

I look forward to checking back in and reporting the answers to all the questions we have about the baby. I'll try write everyday, so if there's no new posts...maybe I'm at the hospital!

Pregnancy

I don't have any recent pregnancy pictures on my computer to share right now. I think this one was taken in November, when I was just 6 months. Things have changed a lot since then. I don't think I can wear that shirt any more. I was glad to be done work this week (my last day was Tuesday!) for a few reasons, one of them being that I had nothing to wear anymore.
It has been a very uneventful pregnancy. I was very tired for a long time and was very happy when I got some energy back in the 4th or 5th month. Up until the last month, I thought pregnancy was pretty easy. I am now tired again and find I have a few more complaints. Soon it should be easy to put on socks and shoes again. I look forward to my back feeling better. I also look forward to doing some of the things I enjoy and have missed, like biking. But, mostly I look forward to meeting this little person who has been kicking me.

Janet, Ian, and ?

I thought I'd try blogging to share with people our experience of having our first child. Today is officially the due date, but I have a feeling we are still going to be waiting a while to finally meet our baby. We are starting to get impatient and want to see what this baby will look like. AND, will it be a boy or a girl? Everyone tells us it will be a boy. I will be surprised if its a girl. Ian thinks it will have red hair. I'm not so sure on hair color. I think the baby will look more like Ian than me. The doctor says she will induce by the 21st. So, as far away as that seems, we should know the answers to these questions in 10 days!