Confusing mommy feelings

I'm not sure how to feel. Kellen started going to a new daycare this week (long story). The second day I literally dragged him screaming out of there. He didn't want to go home with me. This morning he asked "Betty's?". He was upset when I said no, Mommy and Kellen get to play together today. Am I suppose to be happy he LOVES his new daycare? I am glad, but I wish he didn't seem to love it more than me!

I need a journal...

I should probably get a journal for the odd time I need to write on my life reflections. But I don't have one, so here I am. I guess you read by your own free will so I shouldn't apologize.

On Wednesday night, I worked late. I was doing a babyfood making/infant feeding class that went really well. I went as far as to say it was probably the best class ever since I've been working for the Tribal Council. It was the best turnout and the women were so interested and had so many good questions. I really enjoyed all the discussion and I had a lot of fun with these women!

Anyhow, on the way home as I came to the top of the valley the snow was falling and the town lights were twinkling and the lakes were reflecting beautiful light...like a picture in a movie. It took me back to the time, almost exactly 4 years ago when I drove into the town and it looked like exactly the same picture. I remembered how overwhelmed I felt thinking this was going to be home, wondering what kind of a job it was going to be, and just wondering what I was getting into. I was amazed when I realized how much has happened in just 4 years...all the life things like got married, had a kid. But I thought of more, like how this town is home now and how much I've learned about my job, people, and life. It made me thankful. It also made me want to live life with more purpose every day because every day adds up to something bigger in the big picture. Do you know what I mean? I suppose I could try to give an example, but I'm not even going to try.

Ian and Kellen should be home any minute. They went to Regina to watch the Rider game at Andrea's. I'm sure they had more fun than me. I kept checking on the game but I was mostly studying. I write an exam to be a personal trainer on Tuesday. I've finally been through all the material once really good. Now my approach is try get some sleep so I can remember it all. I'm sure I'll be dreaming about muscle names tonight.

Boring Household Update

• I have taken no pictures recently, so you are stuck with a boring update...
• Ian's getting ready to go moose hunting for the week. That means the happiness level is pretty high in our house.
• Kellen is making up for his lack of eating during the week and a half of battling a stomach flu. He is eating everything is sight and constantly asking for more. He must be gathering stores for a big growth spurt. He is even eating meat really well, which makes his mommy very happy.
• After 3 weeks, we finally have our car back. I was getting worried I would be without transportation for the week of moose hunting. Being a one vehicle family was a real pain when public transit is non-existant. On a happy note the bill was much less than we had prepared ourselves for. On a sad note, it's not completely fixed as it still needs a $1000 part. However, happy note - the mechanic is looking for a used part for us, perhaps at the more reasonable cost of $300. Cross our fingers.
• Baby girl is growing more active all the time and will be joining us in only about 11 weeks.
• I am tired all the time. I pretty much go to bed at 8:30 or 9 these days. I seem to barely keep up with meals, house, work, and Kellen. I can't imagine having much else going on in my life. I am already looking forward to not being pregnant anymore.
• A highlight of my week was probably taking Kellen to preschool gym night. Fun to be out with other families and see Kellen have so much fun. (Plus he goes to bed so good when we get home!)
• Also fun was Kids Cooking Club at a school I work with (even though I confess I hoped it would get cancelled cause I was so tired). I had 3 super fun boys in my group that made me laugh. They were pretty excited to crack eggs! Working with kids always gives me the most hope.
• My boys are both taking naps, so I should get to what I came down here to do...go on a scrapbooking frenzy.

Smarty pants

Here's my little smarty pants! I don't care that I look like "one of those parents." I will brag - while I laugh at myself for being so amused by the little things Kellen does.

He managed to find a little hole in the steering column of his payloader that fit Dad's keys. I had a good laugh when I saw him driving around with the keys hanging there. I think he's so smart to know where he should be putting the keys! Dad was quite amused too and got the camera...which lead Kellen to know he'd done something to be proud of.

Kellen does and says lots of new things lately. He's such a little boy now. He throws real great big fits when he doesn't get his way. He tells me to "go" with an emphatic punch in the air. Tonight he didn't want to watch me eat his supper and I got told. He knows how to ask for what he wants to eat...most often "noon-els", also know as noodles. Yesterday I learned that it has to be the usual - rotini pasta. Macaroni does not cut it. He surprised me by asking for toast the other morning and beans tonight at super. His vocabulary is finally picking up the pace a little!

I hope I have a good baby on the way so I can spend lots of time with Kellen on mat leave. I am very much looking forward to not having to drop him at the sitters. If he's grouchy in the morning and I reassure him that we are staying together all day, he is a much happier, cuddlier boy. He is definately communicating his emotions more (or maybe I'm just tuning in now). If I tell him we are going to Lori's he sometimes shakes his head "no". Aww, it breaks my heart.

Deceptively Delicious

Here's the book I've had my nose into a lot lately. I don't often get obsessed with a cookbook, but I've been getting lots of new ideas...for our own house and for promoting healthy eating to the daycares and schools I work with.

I haven't actually followed one of her recipes completely yet. But I've been altering a lot of my favorites with her good common sense ideas. I have lots of pureed squash in the freezer now. I've added some to a pasta dish and to a chili. No one would have ever known. I see more than a nutritional benefit here, since we have more squash from our garden than I care to eat. Maybe we won't have to throw any out next spring.

Since cauliflower was on sale the other day, I bought 3 heads. So here's what's going on in my kitchen as I type... I think my steamer will be getting lots of use while I try out more of these ideas. Tomorrow morning will be scrambled eggs with hidden cauliflower puree. I guess this was one on Oprah that everyone loved. Kellen actually would eat cauliflower no problem, but I wouldn't eat it for breakfast. So, I guess this isn't really just a solution for kids to eat healthier. And, I see how it could save on food costs.

Anyhow, that's enough about my latest obsession. So far, I highly recommend this book. I'm looking forward to trying the homemade ranch dressing made with pureed white beans - I'd love to see this one in daycares if it's good, since I see kids licking it off their carrots. So far, I highly recommend it, but perhaps I should save that statement until I actually try a few of her recipes! Better go get the cauliflower pureed and in the freezer so I can get to bed.

Anyone else tried any of her ideas?

Attempt at family pictures

I thought with us looking so spiffy for the big day, we would get a picture to send out at Xmas, but no luck really. It's impossible to get everyone looking at the same time.


This was by far the best picture my camera got this weekend!

As requested...Kathy's Wedding

The bride and groom looked great...I'm sorry I didn't take a better picture than this. I hardly took any actually. I was thoroughly enjoying the day and plan to get GOOD pics their photographer. The wedding was magical, as Jenn said...I may as well just direct you there for a good summary and better pictures.
While Ian & I were dancing with Kellen, Andrea got some of the evening fun recorded for me...


Doesn't Jeff look like he's having fun!

The kids were the real dancing maniacs of the night.

The Scary Month

I've survived October! At the beginning of the month I felt completely overwhelmed everytime I looked at my calendar. It was full and ugly. I tried to think about it in short blocks of time. Kellen did his best to end the "interesting" month in an "interesting"way. He added to the Halloween decorating on the sidewalk of a neighbors house...with his supper (chunks of spaghetti!) I felt bad that it happened at Val's, yet better there than other places since she's got a great sense of humor and we laughed about it! He had thrown up once at the sitters earlier...and the flu had been going around there...but, he seemed fine and ate a big supper so I thought maybe he'd escaped getting really sick. I learned my lesson anyhow. I spent the rest of the night carrying a very lethargic boy between the couch and the busy door. I was glad Ian got to come home last night. He even cleaned up the accident on couch that I didn't quite catch in time. I was suppose to be doing 3 cooking classes today, but I cancelled 2 and the other one is being taken care of by the other dietitians (I'm so glad we have 3 dietitians at work!) I felt bad about cancelling, but Kellen's still not himself this morning. He wouldn't go back to sleep when he woke up at 5, he whined at me all morning, and he brought his blanket to me and 9:30 and fell asleep in my arms - I don't ever remember him doing that! Now that he's sleeping I'm enjoying getting caught up on things...and getting ready to go to Moose Jaw tomorrow for Kathy & Joe's wedding! So enough blogging for now... Hope you had a Happy Halloween!